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My thoughts on gay marriage

June 28th, 2015 | Posted by jamie in Thoughts

I’ve kept quiet on this subject for a long time. I hate confrontation and there’s no way to talk about this subject without hitting an angry wall on either side. I’ve struggled with it, read the Bible passages, and prayed to God about it.

In high school, before I became a Christian, I was of the opinion that it didn’t matter who your significant other was. If you truly loved them, that was all that mattered. A Christian friend voiced the opinion that he thought it was sin. It was the first time I had run into that opinion and I was pretty shocked when he said it. I remember thinking how narrow minded he was.

In college, I began to read the Bible. I found the passages that condemn homosexuality. I began to realize that the words my high school friend spoke had been truth. According to Christianity, homosexuality was a sin. I prayed about it, and drifted to that side.

As my faith progressed, I discovered more and more shades of gray. Things that used to be simple and black and white  became much more complex when real people were involved.

As homosexuality and gay marriage has become more prevalent in the news, I have prayed more and more about it. It was one of the those things that I had a hard time swallowing from the Bible, but I had just accepted as God’s word. I wish I could say there was more clarity on the subject for me, but the more I prayed, the more confusing it became. I found myself asking God why gay people were being so discriminated and not offered more of God’s grace.

One thing did happen as I prayed. The more I prayed, the more I found myself face to face with real live gay people. I have gay friends, and they are wonderful people. Several of them are Christians. They love Jesus with an intense love that I envy.

I can say with a fact that they did not choose this. This is how they are, how they were beautifully and wonderfully made. I know that some of them tried to change it. I’m sure they felt guilt and shame. In the end, they chose to embrace it.

This whole issue is still fuzzy for me. I read the Bible passages and I struggle. I argue with God about them. I still can’t say with certainty that I identify fully on either side of the issue. I see both sides. Christians, I get it. I understand why you protest. And gays, I’m so sorry for all the hatred and anger you’ve had to endure. It’s not right.

What I can say with certainty is that I applaud the recent Supreme Court decision. Because I strongly believe in equal rights for everyone. People deserve to be treated with respect, even if you completely disagree with their life choice.

I also believe that Christians need to stop judging and start loving. I have enough of my own crap to worry about. Why should I focus on what someone else is doing wrong? We don’t need to keep telling people that homosexuality is a sin. I think we’ve made that abundantly clear. The Jesus I know would embrace that gay person. He would go to dinner with him and listen. He would honor her story and her life.

And that’s what I hope to do as well.

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  • Becky Villareal

    Thank you for sharing this. I too struggle for the same exact reasons.